Beneath the veil of nothingness, nothing survives. Or maybe is simply revealed to have been an illusion all along. It's a liberating realization. The only downside is that the liberation is as meaningless as the illusion. Sometimes I'm tempted to leave in search of a suitable vantage point from where I can witness the story unfold in all its grand absurdity. But then I'm struck by the thought that this was the exact purpose of many quests in the past, most of which ended in the form of one religion or another. This scares me more than most things. Is my non-belief in any kind of belief beginning to take the shape of a belief in itself?
Hahahaha, everytime I start taking myself seriously I'm reminded of these gems,
"Ve vant ze money, or ve fucks you up"
"I mean, say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism Dude, at least it's an ethos"
"He's a nihilist, he doesn't care about anything"
"That must be exhausting"
So anyway, let's end this, whatever this is, with a verse. Cos verses rhyme (unless written by Eddie Vedder), and as long as they do, nobody gives a shit about what they mean. That's the kind of comedic freedom I try to live with.
Flowing, through and over and past everything
Taking me within and with itself
It puts me on the stage, but assigns me no part
It lives inside every song I sing
And secretly smiles when I act too smart
(Does it laugh outrageously when I fart?)
It didn't create Sunday masses and sacrificial altars
It never attempts to guide me towards the light
('Cos isn't the stage where the light is?)
The set of instructions is rather sparse
Enter stage left, and exit to the right
Everything in between comes to me all at once
Every stupid smile and every seething scar
It’s all the same to me unless they kill my fucking car
There are no prophecies that can explain my being
I was born to play my part in the circus of nothing
And all that stands between the final dance
Is everything that I will ever know in this play
Fruitcakes and milkshakes and impossible distance
And then maybe some salvation one fine day
The onlyest way to find out is to find out
To be cuntinude...
